Osama at Heaven’s Gate

I dreamed that Bill Clinton died. At Heaven’s gate there was some difficulty due to his history. He had committed grave sins against sexuality (cf. Sixth Commandment); more serious, for what I could see, were certain sins against property (cf. Seventh Commandment) and gross lies told to gain political advantage (cf. Eighth Commandment); worst of all was his promotion of abortion (cf. Fifth Commandment). But God is endlessly merciful, and Bill entered Heaven instead of waiting eternally in the outer darkness.
Then Osama bin Laden died. With him the picture was quite different: despite the usual storm of peccadilloes, imperfections we all share, here was a man who for decades had prayed four or five times a day and, better still, worked actively at great personal cost for a vision – albeit a mistaken one – of God’s Kingdom in the world. Welcome into the Joy!
Then Osama saw Bill. “That man tried to frame me for the embassy bombs!” he cried, “and when the Afghan government refused to go along with the frame-up he sent guided missiles to kill me and my friends, actually killing some of them and injuring more, besides ruining our homes on the already bleak hillside. I won’t go where he is.”.
What is my chance of Heaven? Do I really want to go, considering who’s there?
John A. Wills 2001.09.25


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